I survived! My first day of having the kids back is over and actually went surprisingly well. My dreams weren't premonitions and were just dreams after all. The children didn't run riot, the TA didn't completely change my activities, I didn't royally cock it up! I actually had an amazing first day and though I'm utterly exhausted, I definitely feel like I've made the right choice in life. All those doubts about whether I could possibly do it have melted away and I know I'm doing what is right for me and what I love.
My class are absolutely lovely, I'm already their 'very best ever and loveliest teacher ever ever' already for some of them apparently! There are a few characters in the class that I've got to spot. Like the one girl who just won't be quiet, she always has something to say! Lovely girl but constantly calls out and interrupts. We had to vote on School Council members today and bless them they were so sweet. It was the first time they've had to do it so they had to nominate themselves, give a little speech and then we voted. Each of the children cam up and told me their vote and towards the end of the class was one little girl who was one of the 'candidates' and she asked whether she could vote for herself. I have to say it made me chuckle and as she was the first person to ask I thought that I'd say yes. She missed out by one vote in the end but I made her the Eco Warrior for our Eco Committee instead so she was happy enough.
I had to learn some tough lessons today though too. I'm the kind of person that likes to please people and keep the peace. I hate talking about things face to face with people, feel so uncomfortable about it! I'd planned out my whole timetable including what I wanted the teacher covering my PPA and NQT times to do - Guided Reading, PE and Science. I thought this would be ok but it turned out that she doesn't have a TA for any of those afternoons so wanted me to change it all. I have swapped Guided Reading round because that does need a TA really to get through it all and I thought I should do it anyway really, so I've given her Music and PSHE, still a big sacrifice for me to give up Music but it's the only way I could do it. So then I was trying to find some kind of solution for Science but I just can't. There were three possible options but one I wasn't prepared to do because it was a subject I specialised in at uni and enjoy (though it's her specialism too) and have also already planned until Christmas and the other two just weren't feasible, though she thought they might be. I spoke to my mentor about it all because I didn't know whether I was being harsh telling her she needed to do Science but she reassured me that it's my classroom so it's my decision and that it was a perfectly acceptable decision to make. So I've got to tell her tomorrow that she's just going to have to do Science by herself. I don't think she'll be happy but I haven't really got much choice! It's so difficult being the person 'in charge' so to speak, I don't like it! I just need to remember that it's my class though and so I shouldn't/can't be a push over!
So, the dreaded O word... Ofsted! The school got a 'good' in it's last Ofsted inspection in 2011 which means that it shouldn't get another inspection for 3 years but... there's always a but! Despite numerous interventions, extra booster groups and all the support in the world our Year 6 class didn't get the results hoped for last year and we've missed our targets by a fair chunk. Our head told us this afternoon in our staff meeting that this means that it could trigger another inspection by Ofsted. I thought I was safe this year, just the mention of the O word has put the fear of god in me! Seriously hope that it doesn't trigger one, not sure I'd cope!
Off to bed now, absolutely exhausted... I'm just not used to seeing 6.30 in the morning anymore!